The LA Fox Developer Newsletter

A PC Odyssey (Con’t from page 6)

“We can’t do that, Mr. Lee. That’s not according to

our procedures.”

After a brief discussion on the merits of change

orders and procedures, I succumb, defeated.

Five days later, I call Dell to get the order status

from my customer rep. I’m told my order will be

shipping late because of a shortage of memory

cache chips. But, wait a second. Wasn’t my previ-

ous order in process , meaning there wasn’t a

shortage of cache? Finally the day arrives (now

three weeks since the original order was placed)

when I’m supposed to get the machine, but it

doesn’t show. I call Dell and learn there is now a

shortage of Pentium chips and motherboards, and

the unit will probably not ship until the last week of

October (six weeks since the original order was

placed). I try to exert a little pressure indicating that

I’m not only in a position to make Dell my com-

pany’s standard, but I’m also in the position of

recommending their machines for client purchases.

After a brief discussion on the merits of my position,

I succumb, defeated.

Now, in a panic because I’ve lost a few thousand

dollars in billable/productive time, I spend the

weekend scouring the local countryside for some-

one who will build my PC, with the components I

want. I locate one. “When do you think it’ll be

ready?” “Three days, Mr. Lee.”

Heart racing with excitement, I call Dell and cancel

my order. “OK, that’s fine”, I’m told matter-of-factly.

After more than 15 years in the manufacturing

arena (before becoming an independent consult-

ant), several of them spent implementing manufac-

turing information systems, it boggles my mind that

Dell would provide this kind of service; it boggles

my mind that they are so locked into their proce-

dures they can’t be the least bit flexible; it boggles

my mind that their inventory system cannot accu-

rately report parts-in-stock allocated parts vs

parts-on-order; it boggles my mind that their order

system does not “talk” to their inventory system.

But what really amazes me is that they didn’t eve

care enough to stop and ask “Why?”.

October 1995

On the

Lighter Side

If Operating Systems

Were Beers

DOS Beer: Requires you to use your own can

opener, and requires you to read the directions care-

fully before opening the can. Originally only came in an

8-oz. can, but now comes in a 16-oz. can. However,

the can is divided into 8 compartments of 2 oz. each,

which have to be accessed separately. Soon to be

discontinued, although a lot of people are going to

keep drinking it after it’s no longer available.

Mac Beer: At first, came only a 16-oz. can, but now

comes in a 32-oz. can. Considered by many to be a

“light” beer. All the cans look identical. When you take

one from the fridge, it opens itself. The ingredients list

is not on the can. If you call to ask about the ingredi-

ents, you are told that “you don’t need to know.” A

notice on the side reminds you to drag your empties to

the trashcan.

Windows 3.1 Beer: The world’s most popular. Comes

in a 16-oz. can that looks a lot like Mac Beer’s. Re-

quires that you already own a DOS Beer. Claims that it

allows you to drink several DOS Beers simultaneously,

but in reality you can only drink a few of them, very

slowly, especially slowly if you are drinking the Win-

dows Beer at the same time. Sometimes, for appar-

ently no reason, a can of Windows Beer will explode

when you open it.

OS/2 Beer: Comes in a 32-oz can. Does allow you to

drink several DOS Beers simultaneously. Allows you to

drink Windows 3.1 Beer simultaneously too, but some-

what slower. Advertises that its cans won’t explode

when you open them, even if you shake them up. You

never really see anyonedrinking OS/2 Beer, but the

manufacturer (International Beer Manufacturing)

claims that 9 million six-packs have been sold.

Windows 95 Beer: You can’t buy it yet, but a lot of

people have taste-tested it and claim it’s wonderful.

The can looks a lot like Mac Beer’s can, but tastes

more like Windows 3.1 Beer. It comes in 32-oz. cans,

but when you look inside, the cans only have 16 oz. of

beer in them. Most people will probably keep drinking

Windows 3.1 Beer until their friends try Windows 95

Beer and say they like it. The ingredients list, when

(Con’t, page 8)

Page 7